Yes, you read that title correctly. Aaron is moving!
We have known for a long time that moving Aaron to a group home would need to be a part of his future. But that part of his future was something we would always refer to as coming someday. The prospect of him moving really wasn’t anywhere near a reality to us, though we knew that this “someday” would…someday…need to be THE day.
Gary and I have faced the truth that we are officially in our old age. We have never wanted or planned for either of our other children to be responsible for Aaron moving when we are gone. We know that planning for and carrying out Aaron’s next steps in life should be our responsibility, not theirs. We also have known that facing this big challenge should be done before a crisis of some sort hits me or Gary.
But what we have known for years in our hearts and on paper has been extremely hard to carry out in Aaron’s life…and in ours. So many obstacles. So many emotions. So many reasons to wait until a better time.
A few months ago, we put out some little feelers to our good friend at Aaron’s day group. She is like a second mother to Aaron and has known him for years. I told Barb that we were ready…maybe?…to pursue these next difficult decisions for Aaron.
Aaron has a sweet friend at his day group. Victoria and Aaron have a very special relationship. We finally started letting Aaron call Victoria his girlfriend last year. They really do seem to love each other.
We talked and prayed about Aaron moving but had no idea how on earth to make this happen. Aaron would NOT want to leave home. He would be very angry and resistant to even the idea, much less an actual move.
One day I told Gary that the only way I could see this working was if there would be an open room in Victoria’s group home. Co-ed group homes are common. But that was a real stretch, I knew. Her house was full, with no vacancies expected. But I prayed anyway that if this was God’s will then a room in that house would open.
On May 4th, I got a text from Barb. She told me there had been a change and that suddenly there was a room opening in Victoria’s house. Oh my! Talk about mixed emotions! We had excitement mixed with concern. But deep down I knew that God had opened a very definite door for us. We could not walk away and ignore this precise answer to prayer. Gary agreed and so we knew we must move forward.
Our other prayer now was that Aaron would want to move. This was another huge obstacle that we saw no way around but for God to work a miracle in Aaron’s heart.
On the day Barb told us about the open room, I started a journal of God’s doings during this process. I would open my Bible and read on those pages. On May 5th, the day after Barb told us about the room, here is what I read.
“When my spirit was overwhelmed within me, You knew my path.” Psalm 142:3
And: “You have worked wonders, plans formed long ago with perfect faithfulness.” Isaiah 25:1
God strengthened my spirit so much that morning with those precious promises about this path He had put us on for Aaron. I certainly did feel overwhelmed, but I knew that God knew my path. Our path. His plans for Aaron and for us would be covered by His perfect faithfulness to all of us.
With Barb’s help, we planned for Aaron to go to the group home one day for supper. We had Victoria ask him and he was beyond excited. That day he rode to the house in the van with Victoria and the rest of the residents.
He hung out there for a few hours and ate supper. While there, the staff showed him the empty bedroom, and they talked to him about moving there.
When I went to pick him up, I cringed when Aaron told me that they had shown him the room and asked him if he would like to live there. I didn’t know they would do that yet. But Aaron was all about it! He thought that was a great idea!
Since then, Aaron has still been very upbeat about moving. It’s amazing! Another very big answer to prayer!
But he’s also going around telling everyone that he’s going to move in with his girlfriend.
“Um, it’s not exactly like that,” I feel compelled to add.
So here we are. We are having our intake meeting next week. I’m not sure of an exact move-in date yet.
My emotions are all over the place. You can imagine. I know we’ll have bumps in the road as Aaron adjusts to leaving home. He is expressing some fears about that.
And I’m expressing my fears to some, but mainly to God. Who can take care of Aaron like I do? Who understands him and can read him like a book? Who will be on alert for his seizures and take care of him when they happen? Who will take him for a slushie or a milkshake? And on and on and on.
But the God Who so definitely opened this door will take care of all those details and will take care of Aaron and of me during this huge transition.
My verse for May 30th: “Do not fear, for I am with you. Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you; surely I will help you; surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.” Isaiah 41:10
How good to know we can trust God with each chapter of our lives, and of Aaron’s!
He Said What?! 