Month: February 2024

Roses in the Right Hands

Yesterday, Aaron and I had so much fun making our annual delivery of Valentine roses to Paradigm, his day group.  The roses are given by our local Dillon’s store, made possible by our sweet friend, Jody.  

I have more fun with this than Aaron does.  He gets nervous about it, wanting things to go just so-so according to his perceived plans.

“Mom,” he told me on our way to Paradigm, “boys shouldn’t get roses.”

“Boys can have a rose if they want one,” I replied.

“But I see only women as being for roses,” he countered.

Oh Aaron.  

So, you can see that Aaron had his mind made up about how this should operate.  I gave him a little pre-event briefing as we drove there, and all was well as far as the guys getting a rose from Aaron.

The roses put smiles on many faces on this Valentine’s Day.  I never capture it in pictures the way I would like but here are a few shots.

Even Piper, the dog, had a rose offered to him by Aaron.

When I watch Aaron’s friends, either at Paradigm or elsewhere, I am so touched by each of their physical struggles.  Recently, Aaron casually mentioned a big change for one of his friends.  It hit me hard.  I wanted to hide behind a closed door away from Aaron and just cry for this dear person.

I watch these special friends of Aaron’s when I pick him up at the end of his day.  Many of their struggles are physical and easily seen.  Some are not so visible but are there just the same.  

I am inspired by their strength amid their daily difficulties…how they accept their situations and keep going…how they laugh and hug and give of themselves to each other.

I saw a quote about a rose that I loved.

“A rose doesn’t talk about its beauty; it just shows it.”

When I look at our special ones, I see a unique kind of beauty.  They don’t know how beautiful they really are…beautiful in the ways that count.  

They don’t talk about their beauty, but they certainly show it in how they love and how they live with resilience and acceptance and strength.  

They’re not held up by the world as models of fame and beauty.  

They don’t swoosh in on a red carpet, cameras flashing, people clapping, gushing with their own vain glory, the subject of tomorrow’s headlines and news reels and parades.

But oh, they show a beauty that far exceeds the gaudy, self-serving lives that are idolized by so much of the world.  

I would give them a million roses if I could, but I hope that the one rose they received yesterday reminds them that they are the true beauties of this world…and they show it every day without saying a word.

Skittles and A Super Bowl Ring

Nearly every day that Aaron is at his day group, one of the staff will take him the short distance down the road to the nearby Quik Trip.  This little outing is the highlight of Aaron’s day.  He loves picking out what food and drink he will buy.  

Aaron especially loves Skittles, but his picky mom (ME!) has told him that he does not need to buy Skittles every day…and he definitely does NOT need to spend the majority of his money on the big bag of Skittles.  A small bag of Skittles a couple times a week is OK.

Aaron has made this rule of Mom’s a big deal.  A very big deal.  He has talked it to death with me…teased relentlessly about buying Skittles when he didn’t buy them…told the staff over and over and over again about how “Mom said NOT to by Skittles!!…and I am quite sure, has talked loudly and clearly to the Quik Trip staff about how his Mom said not to buy Skittles.  

During Christmas, Aaron was taken on his regular trip to Quik Trip.  And guess what?  He was given a special gift from the workers there.

You can probably guess what it was.  

A very BIG container of yummy Skittles!!

Just look at Aaron’s face and you won’t need me to tell you how happy he was.

How I laughed when I saw these pictures!

But more than laughter, I was so touched by the kindness of the Quik Trip workers who obviously have gotten a kick out of talkative Aaron’s Skittles stories. 

What a very nice thing for them to do!

Fast forward now to last week.  Aaron and I had run into our nearby Dillon’s, where he hightailed it to the deli counter as soon as we walked in the door.  I finally caught up to him, only to see him bent over rubbing his hands together and talking loudly in great delight.

“MOM!!” he nearly yelled, “they have Cheddar Pasta Salad today!!!”

Aaron’s love of Cheddar Pasta Salad is well known among the deli staff.  Actually, it’s well known among many of the Dillon’s staff in other departments as well because Aaron makes sure that everybody is at the receiving end of his talking.  

So, on this day I agreed to let him buy a Cheddar Pasta Salad…a LARGE!!…of course!

The very nice woman behind the counter has been getting to know me and Aaron.  She is very patient with Aaron no matter how busy she is.  She has experience with autism because of her own young son.

She happily filled the large container to the brim with the salad while Aaron excitedly oversaw her every move, all the while eagerly talking to her about the upcoming super bowl game.  She told us how busy the deli was as they were preparing platters for the game, and then asked if we would like to see one of the deli trays she had just made.

She showed us the pretty tray and pointed out the super bowl ring that was part of the decoration on the side.  

“Hey Aaron,” she said, “would you like a super bowl ring?”

“Yeah!!” he eagerly answered.

She handed him a ring and he put it right on his finger, a smile spread across his face.  

At Meals on Wheels a couple days later, he wore that ring and showed it to everyone on our route.  

There it was on his finger while we ate our burgers later.  

And I was impressed with how the kindnesses shown to Aaron in these two experiences also show the caring hearts in so many people that cross our paths.  Kindness doesn’t have to come in the form of giving Aaron things, either.

Kindness is also shown by a smile.

Or by not staring at Aaron like he is some sort of oddity.

And certainly, by being willing to listen to Aaron if he happily corners you somewhere with talk of his latest game or book or movie or SKITTLES!!

Being kind to our special son is a huge gift to not only Aaron, but to those of us who love him so much as well.

All our special people will thrive under the sunlight of love and kindness that shines down on them from those we encounter every day.

I am very thankful for those that know this and practice it in our lives. 

Pass the Skittles, Aaron!

I Remember

My husband, Gary, was a helicopter and fixed-wing pilot in the Army for the first nearly 20 years of our marriage.  We were stationed in Colorado when he got orders to serve in Germany.  It’s all a bit of a blur, those months of separation as he attended a school before we went to Germany.  

Finally, it was time for the movers to come.  They loaded up our belongings for transport to Germany.  Well, not all our belongings.  Most of our furniture and all our appliances were put into storage, waiting on our return to the states later…six years later, though we didn’t know at the time it would be that long.

Several more months went by before Gary was assigned temporary quarters.  Off I went with two babies to join him in Germany.  Our temp quarters were on the fourth floor of an old WW2 building.  The laundry room was down in the basement.  Our apartment was full of military furniture that had been used by who knows how many families before us.

Eventually we moved into our permanent quarters.  We had a nice apartment on the top floor of our building, complete with a balcony.  We called this “stairwell living.”  We had some of our furniture but most of what we had was sturdy, used military grade furnishings.  Nothing fancy, for sure, but usable.

All of us wives were in the same boat.  When we would get together, we often found ourselves talking about the furniture we had back in the states.  One missed her living room set, another her big hutch and her nice dishes, or the beautiful bedroom suit one had bought shortly before getting their orders for Germany.

We would laugh and carry on, but all of us did miss what we used to have.

There are times we all miss what used to be.  

The parents who are no longer here on earth.  Or who are here but not here, and we care for them as though they were our children. 

The spouse gone way too soon.

The child that we never dreamed we would lose.

The empty house when all the children are gone.

The healthy body we or our loved one had but is now ravaged by illness or slowed by age.

The friendships damaged beyond repair.

The ministries that once were but are now gone.

We all have our lists, don’t we?  The memories flood in sometimes, and we can say with David in Psalm 42:3-4:

“My tears have been my food day and night…these things I remember and I pour out my soul within me.”

Memories of what was but is no more.

“Sometimes we can remember a ‘before,’ which is no longer present in the ‘now,’ doesn’t seem recoverable, and it saddens and distresses us.”  (Dale Davis)

But David doesn’t end it there.

“O my God, my soul is in despair within me; THEREFORE I remember You from the land of the Jordan and the peaks of Hermon, from Mount Mizar.” (v. 6)

No matter his location or how far he was from the familiar paths of his life, David remembered WHO he needed to remember in the middle of his despair.

He remembered God.

God my rock, David said.  

God my hope.

God my help.

God is present with me today, in my now, just as He was in my past.  

All of you who follow Christ can say the same thing.  Yes, memories can be a blessing, but they can also bring pain and depression.  

O God, help us to not only remember what was, but to remember Who IS!

Great is Thy faithfulness, O God my Father
There is no shadow of turning with Thee.
Thou changest not, Thy compassions, they fail not.
As Thou hast been, Thou forever will be.

Great is Thy faithfulness,
Great is Thy faithfulness.
Morning by morning new mercies I see.
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided.
Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me.

Summer and winter and springtime and harvest
Sun, moon and stars in their courses above.
Join with all nature in manifold witness
To Thy great faithfulness, mercy and love.

Great is Thy faithfulness.
Great is Thy faithfulness.
Morning by morning new mercies I see.
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided.
Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me.

Pardon for sin and a peace that endureth
Thine own dear presence to cheer and to guide.
Strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow.
Blessings all mine with 10,000 beside.

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