Category: Humor

Aaron’s Talking Points #7

Here are more of Aaron’s comments that I have collected over the years.  Enjoy!

 

Aaron told me that the other night he had one of Andrea’s hairs on his toothbrush. “Mom, some of Andrea’s hair leaked onto the counter and got on my toothbrush!”

It’s a good thing he doesn’t keep his toothbrush in my bathroom because my head leaks lots of hairs!

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Aaron: Mom! Did you know there’s an OLD Robocop movie that was around when Dad was around?!

I didn’t tell Aaron, but I think Gary is still around. I’m running down now to check, though, just in case he knows something I don’t know.

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Aaron got a little choked during supper. His observation:

“I swallowed it down the wrong throat!”

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Aaron saw the news and pictures of the nuclear reactor fires in Japan. So he asked, “Mom, what are those ball buildings?”

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Aaron also saw a nuclear physicist being interviewed. This man had some wild gray hair, much like Einstein, so Aaron got excited and asked, “Mom!! Isn’t that the guy that invented…….oh, what was it?………H2O?”

Ummm….No, Aaron. Different formula. Same hair, though.

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Aaron and I were just watching the news. A special segment came on about Michael Jackson. Aaron said, “Hey, I know some of Michael’s dance moves. Want me to show you?”

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Aaron is almost as concerned with the weather as he is with keeping correct times. When time and weather collide…well, hold on!!

Aaron asked me on Thursday night when it was going to rain, as he does nearly every night. I told him that we might get some storms over the weekend. Silly me.

Aaron: When will it storm?

Me: Maybe Sunday evening.

Aaron: When is evening?

And before I could form a reasonable answer:

Aaron: What time is evening?

And again before I could answer:

Aaron: Is evening lunch time?

Me: No, not lunch time. It’s…

Aaron: Is it supper time?

Me: YES!!!! It’s around supper time.

Aaron: So it will storm at 5:00?

AAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!

My plan is to keep a close eye on The Weather Channel, Weather Bug, MyRadar app, AccuWeather, KAKE Weather, KWCH Weather, and 101.3 storm chasers. At the first inkling of a storm here, we are eating supper. I don’t care what time it is, we will eat supper, people!!!!!! 🤣😬💦💨🌩️⛈️⚡

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Last night Aaron wasn’t sure that he wanted to wear green today. “I don’t want to look like a vegetable!” he said. Well, he had four seizures last night so he didn’t get to go to his day group today. I have been counting my blessings today, and one is for Aaron…..that he didn’t have to go out today looking like a vegetable!

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Aaron told me that today he was walking downtown with his group and saw a German restaurant. He looked in the window (poor patrons!) and said that he saw bottles of wine. “So Mom, is that what Germans like for food? Wine?!! Is that all they eat?”

Maybe we should go and check it out!!

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Every time Aaron and I go to Dillon’s he must, if possible, stop by the fresh fish and seafood display. He loves seeing the shrimp, the lobster, the crab legs, and anything else that’s there. Today there was a surprise! Two whole fish!! Aaron was so thrilled that he pushed himself in front of a little family as he exclaimed loudly:

“MOM!! LOOK!! He’s all fish!!!” 😂😂🐟

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Aaron: Mom! If I had a clone, it would be the same of me.

Me: That’s a great way to put it, Aaron!

Aaron: Would you want a clone of me?

Me: NO!! I mean, no.

Aaron: Why not?

Me: Because ONE OF YOU IS ENOUGH!!!

Aaron: OK.

He just walked off with no reaction. Oh, the tragedy of so much wasted sarcasm in this house!! 😆😆💙💙

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And we’ll have more of the same of these Aaron Talking Points!

Trust me!  😊  😊

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Where There’s A Will…

Autism 101:  Individuals with autism tend to “…have eccentric preoccupations or odd, intense fixations…  They tend to follow their own inclinations regardless of external demands…” (Karen Williams)

You got that one right, Karen!

In our home, living with Aaron means that Gary and I also live with his fixations.  Sometimes his obsessions are funny.  Sometimes they are maddening.  Sometimes they are exhausting.

But always, Aaron will…to finish the above title…find a way to fulfill his inner demands of how his life is to be lived.

Like his mealtime routine.  Aaron will always, always, always, have multiple utensils or plates or bowls of whatever kind he desires for each meal.  Here was his place setting recently as he ate lunch in the family room.

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We have come to expect this, and we don’t even try to correct him. He will make sure to have the proper number of knives, forks, or spoons for every meal.  I am just very thankful that I have a dishwasher!

How about movie credits?  Gary and I watched a movie yesterday.  Afterwards, we wondered where the movie was filmed.  We watched the credits to find our answer, which happened to be at the very bottom of the huge stream of names and job titles.  And we laughed at ourselves, realizing we had become…for that moment…just like Aaron.

Aaron…who watches movie credits with as much focus as he watches the movie.

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Aaron loves his Star Light that he turns on every night.  It was a Christmas gift from Kyle and Andrea, and he has turned it on every night since then.   Aaron very quickly developed his own rules for his Star Light.  He wants it turned on just as he is getting into bed.

One night, Gary came upstairs shortly before Aaron was actually getting INTO his bed.  Aaron wanted Gary to see his Star Light, so while Gary stood in the doorway, Aaron turned the light on.  Gary oohed and aahed, Aaron was very happy, and then off went the light.  Maybe two minutes later…tops…Aaron turned the light back on because he was now getting INTO bed and it was the REAL time to turn on his Star Light.

Back to Karen Williams’ quote:  Aaron will follow his own inclinations regardless of external demands.

Gary and I are usually the ones making those external demands in many cases.

Let’s talk sweaters…Aaron’s sweaters, to be precise.  Of course.

Aaron LOVES his sweaters.  Certain sweaters are better than others, and he will wear them until they are worn to bits.  He had this old sweater for several years, but it was his very favorite.  He wore it or carried it or had it nearby, inside and outside…always.

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This year, for Christmas, I ordered him two new sweaters.  They are long and flowing, the kind he loves.  And love them he does!

He wears one pretty constantly.  Inside and outside, his sweater is being worn.

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He also wants to wear it to bed, under all his necessary covers…including his new weighted blanket that he loves.  This means that sometimes he gets too hot, but he will rarely agree to sleep without his sweater.  This happened on Saturday night when he talked about being too hot the night before.

Enter the external demands, made by me.  I reminded him that he should remove his sweater before climbing into bed.  He was reluctant, but finally agreed to those external forces trying to rearrange his internal inclinations.

We discussed it on his monitor when I went into my bedroom.  We discussed it as he stood at my closed bathroom door while I tried to brush my teeth.  And he continued to discuss it with Gary after he clomped down two sets of stairs to Gary’s study.

We thought we had won.  We were the new KING AND QUEEN OF EXTERNAL DEMANDS!!!!

Silly us.

Soon Gary came upstairs.  Aaron called out to him from behind his closed bedroom door, wanting one last word with Dad.

And last word it was…for there lay Aaron.

Wearing his sweater.

On TOP of the covers.

We removed our King and Queen crowns as we climbed into our own bed.

Instead, we wore smiles.

Why fight the inevitable, right?

Aaron will always find a way.

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Talking Points #6

Here are more of Aaron’s comments that I have collected over the years.  Enjoy!

Aaron and I have been watching all the old NCIS shows, and are now on the season where Ellie Bishop joined the cast. Of course, they call her Bishop.

Then there’s Aaron.

“Mom, is The Bishop going to be on NCIS tonight?”

And ever since then, nearly every time we watch – like last night: “MOM!! There’s The Bishop!!” 😂😂😂

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Aaron was telling me all about the ice cream concoction he had the other day. “Mom, it was chocolate ice cream with chocolate syrup and it only came in one size!” What size, Aaron? “HUGE!!!” And he ate every bite.

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Aaron was very excited to tell me this morning that the Quik Trip near his day group was remodeled. I decided that as a special treat I would take him inside that Quik Trip before dropping him off at Paradigm. Aaron was thrilled!

He barreled in the door, garnering looks from the young ladies in front of us. He rubbed his hands together and gave his deep chuckle of delight.

“See, Mom?!! They differened it!!!!”

Don’t look that work up.  Just enjoy it!!

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I was looking at two Penney’s sales flyers when who walked up but Mr. Precision himself.

Aaron: What are you looking at?

Me: Some Penny’s sales flyers.

Aaron (staring down at them for a few seconds): J.C. Penney.

Then he just turned and walked away.

Whatever.

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Speaking of snow, Aaron was looking at some of the areas of snow that still haven’t melted. He asked, “If the other snow has left, why hasn’t the others left?” And I understood this.

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Aaron’s very anxious for me to order him two guide books to some games but I’m waiting because of some disobedience on his part. He called me from his group, asking again about the books, and said, “I’ve had a good day today. And I did good this morning at home, right?” Yes, Aaron. “So how many times do I have to do that?” Hmmm……..not too sure this is gonna work out the way I wanted.

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Aaron was very excited to change his calendar this morning, since we are now in a new month and WE DO NOT STAY ON THE OLD MONTH ONE SECOND LONGER THAN NECESSARY!!!!

He was also looking forward to seeing the new cool animal displayed on the March calendar. We were in a big hurry this morning to get out the door, so we didn’t take time to read the name of the bird. I barely even looked at it.

So this afternoon, Aaron asked me if I would look with him at the bird and see what kind it is. I looked at the small print under the picture as Aaron waited, and then I wished I was not there.

Aaron: What kind of bird is it, Mom?

Me (sighing): It’s a Blue Footed Booby.

Aaron (smile spreading across his face), was suspiciously silent as he walked over to take a closer look.

Me (waiting with dread), wanted to take my leave.

Aaron: Does he have two….

Me (silent gasp)

Aaron: …feet?

Me: Feet?

Aaron: Yeah. Does he have two feet?

I looked, and happily saw that one of his feet was hidden. So we discussed his blue feet as I edged toward the door and made my escape.

Pray with me that we are done with the Blue Footed Booby.   😂

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Aaron, watching me on the treadmill this morning:

“You’re just doing that because you’re fat.”

Not exactly the sort of personal trainer I had hoped for, but this just might work.

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Aaron saw a commercial that must have had a woman wearing a bikini. I wasn’t looking at the television then.

Aaron: Bookinis are weird.

Me: Weird?

Aaron: Well, they’re ugly.

Me: Oh.

Aaron: I mean, bookinis are gross.

Me: I see.

Aaron: Do you want to wear a bookini, Mom?

Me: No!

Aaron: Why not?

Well, Aaron, what about that rain today?

As for me in a bookini, as Aaron calls them….my reluctance might fit in with how he pronounces that word. Pretty scary, me in a bookini.

BOO!!

But I’m not explaining that to Aaron.

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Aaron: “Today someone was in the boy’s bathroom, so I took my chances and went in the girl’s.” Well.

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The city has been repairing our neighborhood pavement, in spots. This morning as we drove out, Aaron asked what the dark stuff was on the road and so I told him it was the new pavement. And he asked, “So are they gonna new pavement the whole road?” I just love how he phrases things!

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And I hope that you have enjoyed these samples of Aaron’s phrasing, as well!

 

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Talking Points #5

Here are more of Aaron’s comments that I have collected over the years.  Enjoy!

 

Aaron was very excited today about eating at Long John Silvers. He loves the fish and the “bread balls” (aka hush puppies).

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Aaron was telling me what he  read in his weather book last night. His take: “The book said it got so cold once that it ruined the whole beer crop!!” Oh, my goodness!!! And I couldn’t even belly laugh.

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I wanted to show the plate that Aaron recently made me. He brought this home a couple weeks ago, as pleased as he could be…..even though he says he doesn’t like art. Look at how he ran out of room to put the last “m’ in “mom,” so it’s at the top. HaHa! I LOVE this! I put it on a stand and have it displayed with great pride on our kitchen server. ♥

 

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Aaron didn’t make his bed this morning. When I dropped him off at his group, he got out of the van and then said, “Oh Mom, can you help me make my bed today while I’m gone?” Help him while he’s gone? Clever, Aaron! I think you just asked me to make your bed FOR you, period.

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Sitting at lunch yesterday, there were two guys in the booth behind us. Aaron, who doesn’t know how to whisper, said – “I can hear what they’re talking about!” Reminded me of the time when we had a guest preacher at church and Aaron “whispered” – “Would someone tell that man to be quiet?!” How red can my face get before I actually have a stroke?!

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The True Story:

Aaron was talking to us on Saturday about how someday he will need to leave our house and live somewhere else. He doesn’t like that conversation. I used Andrea as an example of leaving home, moving to Texas, and living in an apartment until she and Kyle got married. We told him that she was very happy to be on her own when the time came for her to leave. He talked to Andrea on the phone about it later and she repeated what we had said.

Aaron’s Version (told to our neighbor, Amanda):

Mom and Dad were talking to me about how they’re going to kick me out of the house. Andrea moved out of the house when she went to Texas, and she was happy until she married Kyle!

Aaron needs me to be his full-time interpreter and supervisor of damage control!! 😆😆😆

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Aaron: Mom, I ate a marshmallow, raw! I noticed it didn’t have much taste. 😁😋

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Aaron heard Alan Jackson singing “Gone Country” and asked, “Is he saying gone country or gone coo-coo?”

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Aaron and I took Jackson for a walk on this beautiful day. Aaron: “I wonder if Dad will be home later.” Me: “Well Aaron, Dad always comes home.” Aaron: “But I meant a different kind of later.” The scary thing is that I understood exactly what he meant!! HaHa!

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Aaron called me today and told me that he was going to Quik Trip with one of his staff. He had money burning a hole in his pocket, so he asked me what he could buy with it. First of all, I told him no candy. Then I mentioned a salad or fruit. He countered with the idea of corn dogs. I gave in but said to buy no more than three. When I picked him up, he told me that he did get three corn dogs, and a large water. Later, he saw me fixing supper.

Aaron: Mom, what’s for supper?

Me: Egg casserole and salad. Are you eating?

Aaron: Yes! Three corn dogs didn’t stuff me up!

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Aaron has talked and talked and talked some more about the staples in his head. Trust me. Today, on the way home from WalMart:

“Mom!! When they put those staples in, I could feel the hurtness!!”

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Aaron was excitedly telling me about his trip to the pet store with his day group.  “Mom!!!  We saw a parrot and the parrot talked!!”  So, we talked about how the parrot talked.  Then Aaron told me that I need a parrot at home, and I asked why on earth he thought I needed a parrot at home.  “Because you would have someone to talk to you while I’m gone!!” he answered.   ARE YOU KIDDING ME????!!!!  😊  😊

 

Enjoy your day, dear readers.  I WILL be back, trust me, with more of Aaron’s sayings.

Aaron, Autism, and Coronavirus

Surely y’all knew I was going to do this, right?  That I was going to talk about Aaron and Coronavirus.

Does anything…except normal social cues…escape Aaron’s attention?!

Of course, talk of this new virus is everywhere.  We can’t turn on the television for three minutes without someone talking about Coronavirus.

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Let me try to explain how Aaron thinks.  To do so, I’ll go back a little way to the time I took care of our elderly neighbor, Nora.  I helped her for five years, during the time of her husband’s cancer, his death, and her move to assisted living.

Aaron struggled with Nora.  Honestly, he just didn’t like her.  It had nothing to do with whether Nora was likable or not.  So why didn’t Aaron like Nora?  Let me list the ways:

  1. Nora talked in a high-pitched voice that bothered Aaron.
  2. Nora talked too much.
  3. Nora didn’t hear well.
  4. Nora didn’t always respond to Aaron’s comments appropriately, or at all.
  5. Nora became a topic of conversation here at home as I cared for her, so I talked too much about her.
  6. Nora took too much of my time.

I listed the highlights.  I could have listed more but you get the point.  And the point, to all of us, is that Aaron sure did seem selfish and unkind to not like Nora for the reasons listed above.

But you see, to Aaron and to many others with autism, their world and its order is all important.  If a person or an event disturbs their world, woe be to that person or to that event.  And woe to the persons living within range of the anger that will no doubt ensue due to said person or event.

Now we come to today’s current events.  Let me preface this by saying that for some reason unknown to Gary and to me, Aaron has decided that he doesn’t like President Trump.  I don’t want this to turn into a political statement, but Aaron hasn’t heard that sentiment from Gary or from me.  Aaron has decided this on his own, and for reasons he can’t adequately explain to us.  We can only guess that Aaron doesn’t like Trump’s voice and his demeanor.  So there.

Then along came Coronavirus.  Aaron is sick of it, as Nora would have said.  I won’t tell Aaron that Nora would have said that.

But why on earth is Aaron sick of Coronavirus, of all things?!  Let me list the ways:

  1. Trump talks too much about Coronavirus.
  2. Trump talks too much, period, according to Aaron…so if he talks about Coronavirus then Coronavirus is irritating!
  3. Mom and Dad talk too much about Coronavirus.
  4. Mom and Dad need to talk more about Aaron.
  5. Coronavirus has made Wal-Mart very crowded.
  6. Because Wal-Mart is very crowded, Mom doesn’t want to go shopping there.
  7. Since we didn’t go to Wal-Mart, Mom took me to Sam’s.
  8. Sam’s doesn’t have all the things I wanted, and Sam’s was also crowded.
  9. Sam’s is dumb.
  10. This is the fault of Coronavirus.
  11. Coronavirus is dumb.

That’s it in a nutshell.  Coronavirus has become Enemy #1 in more ways than one at our house.

This could be a very very very very long huddling-down-at-home experience.

Although…Aaron does LOVE to stay at home.  If I do decide to keep him at home…and I probably will…and I tell him it’s because of Coronavirus…

We just might have found the cure!

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Talking Points #4

We’re watching some NHRA qualifying. Aaron is still trying to get used to the fact that Andrew is on a new team. His driver, Leah Pruett, was being interviewed so we pointed her out to Aaron. His observation?

“She has nice eye polish!!” 😂

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Aaron and I are getting ready to play Skip-Bo and he’s talking about TNT. Yep…….TNT. So I made the comment, as he asked me all about TNT, that Dad would know more about TNT than I do. Off he trotted downstairs to ask Gary about TNT and I got a little break. I think I will continue to promote Gary’s smartness when these subjects come up.

 

Aaron was describing a woman in the mall who had a long dress and a head covering. He thought she was “Amnish.” After several questions we realized that she was a nun. “Yes, a nun!” Aaron said. I asked if she was with someone and he said, “Yes, she was with her children.” Oh.  I think we have a problem.

 

I took Aaron to Taco Bell after I picked him up from his day group. In typical fashion, he stood at the counter looking at the menu on the wall. He looked and looked and looked and looked some more. Finally, it seemed he might be ready to order.

Aaron: Do you have enchiladas?

Cashier: Yes, we do. They’re not listed on the board, but we do have enchiladas.

Aaron: Oh, OK.  I’ll have a taco salad.

Hahahahaha!!!!

 

Aaron’s always fascinated by the little crossing guards at a particular school crossing that we sometimes drive by. Today we drove by at 5:00 and they weren’t there. Aaron said, “Hey!  Where are those street stopper people?!”  Well, they went home to rest. Street stopping is hard work!!

 

Aaron, who is staying home from his day group today, ate a HUGE plate of scrambled eggs and a HUGE bunch of bacon for a late breakfast. So just now, as he’s ever hopeful for some fast food or a Dillon’s cheddar pasta salad:

Aaron: Mom, what is there for lunch?

Me: Lunch? I thought you would still be full of all those eggs and bacon.

Aaron: But I just wondered, if I eat lunch, what there is for lunch.

Me: But I just thought your stomach would still be full.

Aaron walked away, but not for long. He returned:

“Mom, when all the food in my stomach settles down, at 12:30, then what is there for lunch?” 😂😂

 

Aaron and I ran into a slowdown in the big construction zone this morning on our way to Paradigm. So tonight at supper, Aaron said, “Dad!! Today we hit a slow motion road!”

 

Aaron went into the bathroom after supper & ran out telling me to come quick & see something. I went in the bathroom, he turned the water on & I saw that it was coming out a little crooked. “Look!” he said. “The water is coming out bent!!!” That really bothered him & he tried to press on the faucet to straighten it out. He wants it fixed! No bent water allowed in this house – it’s not right!!

 

It’s so nice to have another day of sunshine. Aaron went outside for awhile, which he loves to do. I asked him if it was nice out there. “Well,” he said, “It was half cold!” Hey, I’ll take it! Half cold beats whole cold any day!!

 

Aaron: We better hurry. It’s almost 8:00.

Me: It’s only 7:20.

Aaron (looking at his watch….wait for it): Well, it’s not on MY watch.

Me: What time is it on your watch?

Aaron: 7:18.

There is nothing new under the sun. And if I must hear this every day, SO DO YOU PEOPLE!!!

Thank you.

 

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His watch!!  🙂  🙂 

 

 

 

Talking Points #3

Aaron’s been having what may be Myoclonic (jerk) seizures on occasion. While I in no way take these seizures lightly, what he said about it yesterday was pretty funny. He said, “ALL my arms and ALL my legs were shaking!!” Excuse me now – I need to go count his arms and legs to see just how many he has!

 

Aaron likes to call us Master, sometimes adding a not-so-flattering word with it, like Master of Darkness. It comes from some of his games and movies. Yesterday at Aldi, I told him to carry our bag of groceries to the van while I put the cart up. “Yes, Master,” Aaron replied. The young mother also putting up her cart heard him, and just smiled. I wonder what she thought? Either that I’m a very stern mom, or that we’re way too hooked on I Dream of Jeanie.

 

Aaron: Did we get any mail today?

Me: Yes, we got three things.

Aaron: Was any of it bad? (Junk mail)

Aaron (Before I could answer): Did Dad tear any of it in that paper breaking thing? (shredder)

 

Aaron: Mom, you know what I noticed the Olympics is all about?

Pause for me to answer.

Me: What did you notice the Olympics is all about?

Aaron: SNOW!! It’s all about snow!

We’ve explained Winter Olympics and Summer Olympics, but I’m not sure it stuck. ☺️🏂⛷️

 

On our way home from his day group:

Aaron: I’m STUFFED!! The bacon and eggs you fixed for breakfast, and then I had burritos!

Me: You had burritos for lunch?

Aaron: Yes! Barb and Brandy took me and Yolanda to get burritos.

Me: Were they good?

Aaron: Yeah! The people asked if we wanted beef or chicken for the insides! 🙂 I got chicken!

I never thought of burritos as having “insides.” Not sure I WANT to think of burritos as having “insides!”

 

I sent some food with Aaron to Paradigm today – peanut butter crackers, cucumbers, a granola bar – so he just told me that they stopped at Quik Trip and he bought two sausage biscuits and a slushie. He added, “Later I ate the food you sent so it would settle my stomach.” Tomorrow I’m just sending Pepto Bismol.

 

Aaron’s ear was bleeding, so I asked him what happened.

“I was scratching an itch off my ear!” 😄😄

 

I asked Aaron what movie they went to see today.

Aaron: We saw Samson! He was Noah’s brother, right?

And later: God gave Samson his strength. Then he could beat up people!!

I think we need to revisit that Bible story. 😁

 

Aaron walked up behind me at 6:44 this morning. He had just gotten out of bed, not even stopping at the bathroom first.

Aaron: Mom, guess what I saw?

Aaron then waited on me to guess.

Me: What did you see?

He reached into his right pocket. Nothing. He reached into his left pocket. Nothing.

Aaron (finally!): Spiders!

Me: WHAT??!! WHERE??!!

Aaron (very calmly): On my floor.

Me (not very calmly): OH DEAR!!!

I grabbed my glasses as I tried to gather my nerve and wondered if our exterminator could make an emergency call today…or if another emergency call would be made and I would soon be in an ambulance.

Aaron was in no hurry as he walked up the hall to his room. TORTURE!!! Once in his room, he turned and gave me a smile. And I knew.

Me: Aaron! Did you just dream about spiders?

Aaron (flatly, but with that smile): Yes.

He is quite happy that he pulled one over on Mom. He should be happy that he is still standing and breathing!

I am, too. Still standing and breathing, that is. And happy. Happy Aaron’s little story was so clever…and NOT true!!

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Aaron went to the mall today and was telling me that he got an M&M ice cream thing at Dairy Queen. I had told him not to get the triple death by chocolate upon chocolate thing that he usually gets, so he was quite proud of himself for just getting the M&M creation. Then he told me that his friend, Shauna, saw him eating it.

Aaron: Shauna told me that was her favorite.

Me: Did she?

Aaron: Yeah. So is it OK that when it was half high, I let her have the rest?

Aaron not only has a sweet tooth, he also has a sweet side. He loves giving things away to his friends.

And I LOVE how he described giving it to her when he had eaten some of it while Shauna watched. He didn’t give it away until it was “half high.”

He’s not half bad, is he?

And of course I told him it was a very wonderful thing to do.

 

Me: Aaron, go ahead and take your pills. It’s 9:30.

Aaron, pushing up his sleeve to see his watch: It is not 9:30.

Me: What time is it?

Aaron: 9:26.

Me, in my head: AAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

There. I feel better.

 

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Talking Points #2

Aaron is hovering, in count-down mode until he and I watch a DVD tonight. Every couple minutes he wanted to know what I was doing now, and what I was doing next. AAAHHHH!!!!

Finally, I said, “Aaron, you go do your thing and I’ll go do my thing, and then we’ll watch a DVD.”

Aaron: “What kind of my thing are you going to do?”

He doesn’t deter easily. 😛🙃

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One of Aaron’s staff is pregnant. Just now Aaron said, “You know what I don’t do anymore? I don’t call Misty ‘Miss Fatso’ anymore.” Oh my word!

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I fixed stir fry for supper. Aaron was chasing a green pepper around his plate with his spoon and finally said, “This pepper keeps slithering away!” Yep, I fix some very interesting stir fry! Dare to try some?

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Aaron told us that he saw a big Great Dane in a pet store the other day. We asked him what the dog looked like and he said, “He was black with white spots and they were NOT dandruff!” That is SO good to know!

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Aaron knows that often on Saturdays I just wing it for supper. And sometimes we have his dream supper – PIZZA! So every Sat. morning he begins the questioning and it lasts all day – “What’s for supper, Mom?” But just now, with no satisfactory answer, he changed his tactic – “Mom, do you wonder what’s for supper?” Yes, I do, Aaron! I wish someone would tell me!

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Aaron was talking about the hot and cold air masses that collide and cause tornadoes. Here’s how he explains it: “Spring and summer get all mixed together!” Couldn’t have said it better myself!

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Aaron and I scooted down to Dillon’s on this snow day. I got some Chinese food, including some Crab Rangoon. Aaron was excitedly telling Gary about it because there are some for him to eat – if he will.

“DAD!!! Mom got Chinese food at Dillon’s and she got some CRAB LAGOON!! Have you ever had CRAB LAGOON?!!”

I do think we’ll pass, Aaron. 🤢🤮😁😁

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Aaron this morning, standing outside my bathroom door:

“Mom! This will make you laugh! Even though I went to bed at 9:02, I woke up at 11:39 and thought it was time to get up!!”

I’m laughing, yes, but not for the reason Aaron thinks. 😂😂

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A massage therapist comes to Aaron’s day group every Wednesday to give the clients a massage. Aaron, who notices everything, was telling us this past Wednesday about the music that she plays while giving the massage. Nature music, you know….calming and soothing music.

Aaron: It sounds like music that goes outside!!

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As part of Aaron’s Friday special goody bag, I got him a small bag of cheesy popcorn. I wasn’t sure if he liked it, but I am sure that I do. He has ignored it, so I decided that I could no longer resist. I quietly opened it while telling myself that I will buy him a new one tomorrow. The only problem is that he walked in the family room and saw me eating from his bag of cheesy popcorn. I was caught red handed, and feeling like a kid when Dad would find the stash of candy under Jan’s and my pillows at night. Aaron stopped dead in his tracks when he saw me on the couch eating his cheesy popcorn that he had totally ignored for two days.

Aaron: MOM!!! That’s MY popcorn!!

Me: (Feeling like a terrible mom and a lousy thief) I’m sorry, Aaron. I’ll buy you a new bag tomorrow.

Aaron just stared at me.

I stared back, feeling like the tables had turned from what they usually are. I was the guilty one. I was squirming.

Finally…..

Aaron: You are a very foolish woman!

And he walked away while I didn’t know whether to laugh or to crawl under the couch.

I have been duly reprimanded by my autistic son!

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Last night, Aaron was planning our lunch location for today, before his dentist appointment.

“Mom!! Can we eat at Border On The Grill??” 😅😍😋

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“Mom, this has vegetation stuff in it!”

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Aaron knows that when he sets the table, I always tell him to wash his hands. So this evening, after eating a few M&M’s, he offered to set the table for supper.

“Mom, can I set the table? And my hands are clean because I washed the M&M grease off!”

😁😝🤔

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Aaron: MOM!! Fruit Roll-Ups look like carpet!! 😆😆

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Fruit-Roll-Ups (2)

 

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Aaron saw a McDonalds commercial and asked, “Mom, what’s the AGNES steak burger at McDonalds?” Not sure I want to try it and find out now.

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At 4:48 p.m. –

Me: Aaron, would you like some Mac and Cheese for supper?

Aaron: Yeah!!

Me: O.K., I’ll fix you some.

Aaron: But not now. It’s not 5:00.

(Supper is at 5:00, people!!)

Me: But I can start it now.

Aaron: Then it’ll be 5:00 when it’s ready?

Me: Yes, it will be 5:00.

So Aaron’s world was set straight, and supper is not going to be BEFORE 5:00!!!!

The End. (But not really). 🤣😜😋❤️

 

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The Bedroom

Aaron went to the Goddard Day School for three years, graduating from there at the age of 21.  His teacher, Tom, was just wonderful with Aaron and with all the students.  Tom would have one-on-one time with each student.  He would fix tea, sit with each one, and just talk and connect.  Tom called that time Tea with Tom.

When Aaron was a senior and ready to graduate, he was allowed to quit going to school earlier than those students who weren’t seniors.  Tom was still teaching, so one day he contacted me and asked if he could have one more Tea with Tom time with Aaron.  He said he would come to our house, so we agreed on a day for Tom to come. 

On the morning Tom was to arrive, I had things ready for our Tea with Tom.  Tom wanted me to join him and Aaron.  Gary was at work, even though he had a bad cold, and couldn’t be there for our tea time.  That little detail about Gary having a cold is important.

So is the fact that off our kitchen, down a couple little steps, is a guest bedroom.  And a small bathroom.  Because of Gary’s bad cold which made him cough all night, he had been sleeping in that guest bedroom.  This is another important detail to know. 

Tom, Aaron, and I were enjoying our tea as we sat at the kitchen table.   Aaron was full of non-stop talking, as always, and Tom was his usual patient self. 

Tom turned to me at one point and asked if he could use our bathroom.  I pointed him in the direction of the small bathroom.  As he headed that way, he saw the bedroom and for some reason he commented about it.

“I didn’t know you had a bedroom there,” Tom innocently said.

And before I could even reply, Aaron answered.

“Yeah,” he flatly replied to Tom.  “That’s where my Dad sleeps.  He doesn’t sleep with my Mom anymore.”

Well.

There it was, on the table……like a family secret thrown out there for Tom to know.

I was horrified.  Mortified. 

I looked at Tom, my face flaming at this point.  But Tom had turned and was heading for the bathroom.

“It’s not that way,” I somehow managed to say.

“You don’t have to say a thing,” Tom answered.

“YES, I DO!!!!” I blurted out.

So I explained Gary’s cold…..and his coughing……and his thoughtfulness in sleeping in the guest bedroom so as not to bother me……and that he and I were fine. 

Why was I having this conversation with a man??!!

And Aaron, as usual, was oblivious to my embarrassment and to Tom’s discomfort with the direction this conversation had taken. 

When Tom returned, our Tea with Tom resumed.  We chuckled and nothing else was said about this family secret, at least not that I remember.

Some things are best forgotten. 

Some things still make us laugh, years later. 

And Aaron…..nothing much escapes his notice. 

And he will tell it…..sometimes yell it. 

Every.  Single.  Time.

 

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Aaron’s Talking Points

I’ve been thinking about the fact that I don’t often write a blog where I just share some of Aaron’s sayings.  His unique way of expressing himself is, after all, the reason I started this blog.  Therefore, I hope to share Aaron’s Talking Points more often than I’ve been doing.  Many of these have appeared on my HeSaidWhat Facebook page, but many of my blog readers haven’t seen them.  So!  Here goes!

 

Sometimes Aaron is very precise in what he says. For instance, he ordered a Top Sirloin steak in a restaurant one day. With a little prompting, he ordered it well done. Thereafter, and probably still today, Aaron tells everyone that he ate a “Top Sirloin Well Done.” He says it all together as if it’s one name, the name of his steak.

He wanted to buy some saltine crackers. We bought Zesta crackers, but to Aaron they are “Zesta Original Crackers.” That’s what’s on the front of the box, people! “Mom! I like those Zesta Original Crackers!”

So, yesterday Aaron looked out the window just as the mail truck pulled up in front of our house.

“MOM!!! The U.S. mail is here!!”

 

 

When I picked Aaron up from his day group, he told me about going to Quik Trip.

Aaron: Antoine took me to Quik Trip today!

Me: Good! What did you buy?

Aaron: I got hot dogs and coffee.

Me (thinking of caffeine in the coffee): What time did you go to Quik Trip?

Aaron: 3:06.

Does his precision make you smile like it does me?

Every. Single. Time. 😃😃❤️❤️

 

We woke up to a very foggy morning.

Aaron: Mom, when I woke up this morning, my window was blurry! 😀😀

 

Aaron would eat 7-Layer Salad every day of his life if I made it often enough for him to eat every day of his life. He was putting in his order for his special meal tomorrow, and of course 7-Layer Salad was on his list. I told him I wasn’t sure if I was making that tomorrow. He thought about that for a few minutes.

“Mom,” he finally said. “I know what you can do. You can start the boil of the eggs in the morning!” 😀😀

 

Aaron, after checking last night to see if NCIS Los Angeles was on TV:

“Mom! It’s not on! The 62 Granny’s Award Show is on!”

Yay for 62 Granny’s getting awards!! 😂😂

 

Would you like a little pizza with your cheese, Aaron? 🤪😄😋

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Aaron has a friend at his day group whose heritage is Korean (I think). He was talking about her today, trying to tell me her nationality and having a hard time doing so.

“Mom? What’s that Chinese thing that starts with a K?”

 

We’re having bad weather today, including storms with lightning. Aaron is always concerned about the lightning hitting his computer so he asks and asks if he should turn off his computer. He also likes to look at the radar on my phone. He is his mother’s son!

I’ve often shown him the radar and pointed out some storms headed in our direction. I sometimes refer to them as a clump of storms coming our way.

So earlier this morning, as he followed me around the house and fretted over his computer being hit by lightning, he said, “Mom! Is that lump of storms going to hit us?!”

 

Aaron: Hey Mom, can I have some of that sparkling grape juice? You know, the kind that looks like it’s in an alcohol can. 🤣🤣🤣

 

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Aaron wants more of the sparkling grape juice tonight. He wants to be sure I put it in a clear glass so he can see it. And he’s still loving that bottle.

“It looks like an alcoholic bottle in a bar!”

Should I be worried? 😁 😁

 

Aaron would eat 7-Layer Salad every day of his life if I made it often enough for him to eat every day of his life. He was putting in his order for his special meal tomorrow, and of course 7-Layer Salad was on his list. I told him I wasn’t sure if I was making that tomorrow. He thought about that for a few minutes.

“Mom,” he finally said. “I know what you can do. You can start the boil of the eggs in the morning!”

 

I’ll end with a cute picture of Aaron and our neighbor’s cat, Moe.  And trust me, I’ll be back with more of Aaron’s words!

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