Automatic Uncle Aaron

I’m sitting here staring at this blank screen, wondering how I can convey Aaron’s adjustment or lack thereof to being Uncle Aaron.  I think the best way to do so is to share with you a statement he made not long ago.  Here is Uncle Aaron in true Aaron form, talking about his role as an uncle.

“Well, Andrea made me the uncle without asking.  Why did she automatically make me the uncle?!”

Shame on Andrea, right?  

Oh, Aaron.

I made a feeble attempt to explain this dynamic of becoming an uncle, but Uncle Aaron was already on to another topic, and I knew when it was time to just hush.

As I have said many times in the past and am sure I will continue to say many times in the future, Aaron’s main concern in life is Aaron.  His schedule, his routine, his comfort, his attention…these are a few of the things that matter most to him.  When the title “Uncle” is added to his name, that means there is another person in his world that made him an uncle…and that little person sometimes takes Aaron’s schedule, routine, comfort, and attention, and stands all of it on its head.  

Aaron’s world is jumbled during those times.  He is not the center of attention, the master of his world, the keeper of his schedule…and this disruption is HUGE to him.

You should hear him at the dinner table when Andrea, Kyle, and Ryker are at our house.  He literally will not quit talking, and when he is interrupted by us giving Ryker attention, he is perturbed.  Or when Aaron takes a bite and we can use those two seconds when he is not talking to jump in and quickly start another vein of conversation, Aaron huffs and puffs and chews extra fast so he can quickly start talking again.  

He cannot figure out why on earth we would interrupt his monologue about the core of the earth, the solar eclipse, the ancient cave bones that were unearthed, what causes earthquakes…and by the way, why didn’t the moon melt during the recent eclipse??

BUT…Aaron, despite all these interruptions into his ordered life, is surprising us with his efforts to assimilate Ryker into his life and to try to understand his new little nephew.

Ryker just stares at Aaron, waiting for eye contact and for a response.  He doesn’t get that from Aaron yet, of course.  Aaron has yet to talk to Ryker.  That concept is just too hard for Aaron.  So, Ryker observes his Uncle Aaron with great curiosity, even at only 15 months of age. 

What Aaron does love to do is to give Ryker things.  Here he is sharing his pecans with Ryker.

He was super excited for our sweet little neighbor to share her chalk with Ryker.

And for the first time in years, Aaron wanted to have an Easter basket and an egg hunt like Ryker.  A little jealousy there, I’m sure, but it was fun and had some sweet moments.

The good times and the progress we see is very encouraging to us.

They truly are more frequent than the other side that crops up when Aaron is feeling usurped and not loved as much as Ryker.

After all, Aaron may have automatically been made an uncle but knowing how to really BE an uncle is not automatic for Uncle Aaron at all!

We have certainly learned that fact over this past year.

And we have also learned to be thankful for every single bright spot that we see along this growing Uncle Aaron journey.

Author: Patty hesaidwhatks

I'm Patty and I write about our adult son who has Epilepsy and Autism, who still lives with my husband and me, and who is a package full of many surprises and joys and challenges and TALK! Lots of talking, which creates laughter and some other reactions as well. I also write about how God shows Himself to me in everyday life.

25 thoughts on “Automatic Uncle Aaron”

  1. What a joy to have Ryker and his parents close. Aaron will need more time but he may get skinnier from talking nonstop and not eating as much. LOL Change is difficult. Blessings of extra patience to you Patty, and the rest of your family! ❤️

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  2. Progress!! I’m glad to hear about this, Patty. Please keep sharing, and I’ll keep praying whenever I remember &/or see a notification from you.

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  3. This post made me laugh out loud even more than usual! You tell Aaron’s story so well! I LOL because I love Aaron and I know him so well. I know him through all my students over the years who were just like him, students I loved for their innocence, honesty, and transparency.
    I couldn’t help but see how much we are like Aaron before God. We think it’s all about me and my brief time here on this earth, right? Truth be told, we are just as egocentric as Aaron. The difference is, Aaron says it like it is. I remember one of my favorite students who got in trouble for being honest. The teacher asked him why he wasn’t paying attention. He said, “Because it’s boring.” (I’m sure it was!) I tried to explain it to her, but, well, let’s just say she didn’t have ears to hear.
    I always look forward to your posts. And, by the way, don’t tell Aaron I said this, but Ryker is adorable! God bless you and all your family, Patty!

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    1. Thank you so much, Cindy. It’s comforting to me to know that Aaron is not atypical in his attitudes and reactions, though that may sound strange. Oh, the stories I have of Aaron’s honesty. He introduced a teacher to us one time as looking like a hedgehog because of her spiked hair. She was NOT happy and we knew we were in trouble with her. And yes, I am just like Aaron in my relationship with God. God shows me that often. Love you, Cindy, and God bless!

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      1. Oh Patty! LOL! I’m pretty sure that “hedgehog” was an accurate description! 🤣 I love you guys! Wish I could visit with you. We would have a lot of funny stories to share. Laughter is good medicine!

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  4. Aaron is not going to be able to resist that adorable little Ryker for much longer! Meanwhile, this insight: “We are never more like God than when we give”–Chuck Swindoll. Aaron is learning to give in new ways, demonstrating God’s love to his little nephew, even if he (Aaron) isn’t aware. And as you lavish upon him patience, accommodation, understanding, and love every day, YOU, my friend, are shining like a star!

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  5. I love how Ryker just observes Uncle Aaron, my kids were that way with Uncle Jeff when they were little…and sometimes still are!🤣

    I love that there is joy to be experienced even in these hiccups of overcoming. I always look forward to reading your updates!❤️ Sweet blessings, friend!!

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  6. Even adults who are not around children much can be awkward interacting with them, so at least Aaron is taking baby steps forward. Maybe when his adorable nephew becomes more conversant, he will interact more. Great pictures by the way! 🙂

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  7. Thanks so much for the reminder that we need to simply accept people as they are, and not keep trying to get them to be who we want them to be. Aaron is doing his best, but he doesn’t quite know how to make Ryker a part of his orderly world. It does seem to me, simply from reading your blog and descriptions of the situation, that there is a lot of love in your family, and that love is making the whole situation tolerable. I’m glad Aaron shares things with Ryker, and that Ryker will grow up with Aaron as that will teach him to be more tolerant and compassionate towards those who are “different.” But mostly, I’m glad that you are able to be so honest about your family and are willing to share you insights, struggles and signs of progress with us through your blog. It really is a gift, and I hope you know that!

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  8. Patty, that last picture is absolutely priceless. So why didn’t the moon melt during the most recent eclipse? Aaron asks questions I never would have thought to ask. That said, did he get to enjoy the eclipse in your neck of the woods? We had 89% coverage here on the east coast and the cloud cover held off just long enough to enjoy it.

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    1. Aaron was beside himself with excitement during the eclipse. He made it so much more fun than it would have been without him around. We had about the same coverage as you did here in southern Kansas. So glad your cloud cover held off long enough to enjoy it!

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  9. Patty, so often when you share Aaron stories I feel like they are a microcosm example of humanity’s relationship with God.

    The patience, love, and grace you extend to Aaron exemplifies God’s character traits with us. Your recognizing incremental growth in Aaron is likely similar to God seeing our sanctification progress. Thanks for sharing truth, encouragement, and laughs! God bless you.

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