Leave Me Alone!

Aaron’s been hard to rouse out of bed for the past several days.  I keep the monitor on at night and haven’t heard any seizures so I don’t think it’s seizure related.  Maybe he’s staying up too late reading at night.  Or maybe it’s because we take his keyboard away at night and so he doesn’t have the excitement of a game to wake up to each morning.

He also wakes up talking about very tired he is.  Last week he said, “Mom, I slipped out of bed at 6:17.”

You slipped out of bed?    “Yes!  I was on the edge and then I just slipped out!”  I asked him if his sheets were slippery but he didn’t react to that like others might have.  Sometimes I think I’m quite funny but Aaron rarely thinks I’m quite funny……….which I also find to be quite funny, actually.  His lack of reaction to my jokes really is hilarious sometimes.

Back to his slipping out of bed…………..I said, “So you mean that you FELL out of bed?”

“Yeah, I slipped out of bed.  Have you ever slipped out of bed?”  Well, Aaron, I have slipped out of bed but not the way that you slipped out of bed.  I actually slipped out of bed whereas you actually fell out of bed, obviously, etc., etc., etc.  I had this conversation with myself, by the way – not with Aaron.  He would not have valued it like I did, believe me.

This morning he was snug under his covers and did not appreciate my efforts to get him up.  I was kind; I was soft spoken; I didn’t linger long or have many words…………in other words, I did everything possible to ease him into this cruel reality that he was going to have to get out of bed. When I have to go in and wake him up, he’s often grouchy.  When he gets up on his own terms then he’s usually in a better mood.    Finally, I walked past his bedroom and on my way downstairs I simply told him that I was going to pour his coffee and get him a bowl of his favorite applesauce.  Soon I heard him laboring down the stairs and as he walked into the kitchen, I tried to ignore him and be unaffected by his grouchy face.  It’s better to be low-key when Aaron is grumpy.  I fixed his applesauce, laid out his comics, and poured his coffee………..all while listening to him tell me once again about how tired he was and that he didn’t want to be bothered.

OK, Aaron, I’m going back upstairs to finish getting ready.  Off I went, knowing that he wanted to be alone…………or at least ACTED like he wanted to be alone.  He polished off his applesauce quickly, and soon I heard him laboring back up the stairs.  And Aaron, who wanted to be left alone and not to be bothered because he was so tired, walked into my bathroom where I was getting ready.  He was carrying his coffee, which he carefully placed on the bathroom counter.  He sat down beside his coffee, getting settled and comfortable in the room with the person that he didn’t want to be around, according to him.  He sat there looking at me as I just ignored him and kept getting ready.  I didn’t say a word.  He slurped some coffee.  He wiggled into an even more comfy position.  He slurped some more coffee.  He watched me closely and I just kept quiet, not acknowledging him in any way.

Finally he broke the silence and said, “I wish you would just leave me alone.”

Seriously, Aaron?  So why did YOU come up the stairs and why did YOU come in my bathroom and why did YOU sit down here and why did YOU settle here to slurp your coffee………..but you wish that I would leave YOU alone?  Oh, never mind.  Another conversation with myself!  I talk to myself a lot around Aaron, and he doesn’t even know it.

The fact is, he doesn’t really want to be left alone and ignored, no matter how much he tries to act like he does.   Leave me alone, Mom…………but don’t really leave me alone.  Don’t really ignore me.

And as he showed me once again this morning, even when I’m really trying to ignore him, he won’t let me!  He can’t verbalize like you and I can, but he does manage to get his message across.

I can get my message across, too.  Tomorrow I may just show him what it means to be PUSHED out of bed!

Author: hesaidwhatks

I write about our adult son who has Epilepsy and Autism, who still lives with my husband and me, and who is a package full of many surprises and joys and challenges and TALK! Lots of talking, which creates laughter and some other reactions as well. I also write about how God shows Himself to me in everyday life.

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